Hello (hello, hello, hellooo… echos…), dear readers! Are there even any of you out there still? It’s incredible how quickly time slips through your fingers; one minute you’re typing your Fresh Start Manifesto, and the next thing you know it’s two years later and not a blog post in site. Maybe this lightening-speed time jumping simply comes with getting older, or maybe I’m just watching too much Doctor Who. Either way, I genuinely feel like I was just here yesterday.
In an effort to keep this as short and sweet as possible (which is never really possible when I’m involved), here’s a brief history of how these last two years have gone:
- Arrive in the UK full of hopes and dreams, determined not to fall back into the trappings of big-corporate-desk-land. Excited to start my new life, with my new friends-to-be, in a new culture that I would surely fit into immediately
- Find apartment with husband in almost-dream-location, and throw myself into the community happenings, getting involved and meeting lots of smiling people. This is easy!
- Start meaningful ‘work’ search (because it’s not really work if you love what you do!)
- Two months pass and the only ‘work’ I am seriously considered for is exactly the Work (with a capital W!) that I did before. Quickly realize not having worked here before is working against me. Also: money burning fast (London ain’t cheap, my friends). Also, also: making friends when not traveling, and/or in college/university is harder than it looks
- Decide to sell my soul (‘limited time only!’), and go back to what I know in an effort to float my sinking economy till I can make my daydream next step happen. Soul self-destructs in five, four, three, two….
- Spend the next year and a bit exploring my new home country (which is really quite lovely, after all), and promising myself that ‘next week is the week I do it!’ But what ‘It’ is, I have no idea
That brings us up to this previous March of 2015 (with a lot of detail left out, might I add – there was plenty of greatness involved these last two years, including some wonderful people I met through soul crushing job, as well as all the amazing places I’ve gotten to visit in the UK, which I only lightly touched upon above – favorite so far being the utterly impressive Snowdonia). The biggest problem I faced in the previous two years was an absolute lack of inspiration (ironic, no?). I was mentally spent, and feeling rather sorry for myself that I just couldn’t seem to feel anything anymore. Cue the scene where the person is huddled on the bathroom floor, crying out to the Universe for something to change (except replace the bathroom floor with a sofa and blanket; no need for cold or discomfort here!).
I’m honestly not sure what did it, but I suppose there was a bit of a ‘F*@k It!’ moment, and I decided to sign up with Institute for Integrative Nutrition, an idea I had been toying with for quite some time. To say this was one of the best decisions I’ve ever made is such an understatement. I won’t give away too much, but very quickly after beginning the course, the butterflies returned to my stomach, and I began to dream again; even though I wasn’t sure what I was doing exactly, I was just so damn happy to dream, and to know that this time it will be different. This time, I’m going to do something special.
And so for the second time in my life, I have just quit my secure job, which, for all of it’s upsides, simply doesn’t make my heart sing (and what does this world need more of, folks? that’s right; more singing hearts). I don’t have a trust fund, or an unlimited supply of cash funneling into my bank account; there’s just a few very supportive people in my life, and the ability to go with my gut.
To say I’m not scared at all would be a bold faced lie; after having to go back to what was once before, the reality of being faced with reality is very real (but really, it can happen to anyone, and this time round I will definitely be taking on some sort of supplementary work, albeit much more flexible and in alignment with my goals, till I can fully financially sustain myself doing what I love). But fear breeds creativity, and creativity breeds inspiration, and all I know is that I’m doing the right thing for myself, right now. Nobody is perfect, and sometimes we have to take a couple of steps back before we can begin to move forward again (as the proverb says, ‘Fall down seven times, get up eight’). I’ve got a renewed magic flowing through my veins, and I hope to re-inspire you once more to live the happiest (and healthiest!) life of your dreams. I’m following my heart; will you follow it with me?
*Sidenote – Just because working a corporate desk job isn’t right for me, doesn’t mean there is anything wrong with it for someone else. One persons nightmare is another persons dream, and If you’re lucky enough to have found work that inspires you and gets you waking up with starlight in your eyes each morning, no matter what it is, then you’re one step ahead of the game already!